Some cheer this morning from Tacoma on the “Beaver Housing Market”. I guess things have really gotten cut-throat in the home buyer market. If all else fails look for beavers!
Beaver Housing Market
The market is hot and the water is cold.
Dreaming of that getaway lodge? The Port’s Upper Clear Creek Mitigation Site has everything a giant aquatic rodent could ever need.
A grove of delicious willows? Check. Nonstop flowing water to dam? Check. An endless supply of mud to push around? Check. If you’re a beaver in the market for some new digs, check out these current listings.
Hahaha. Get it? The article practically writes itself. Of course beavers would never buy a house. They just make their own.
The starter home
First-time builder. Last year’s kit (baby beaver!) is all grown up and has its own hip new pad to show for it.
Hmm I don’t about bragging about a underwater entrance. It’s like a car bragging about having tires, Or an airplane ad boasting about flying off the ground.
They all do.
The rambler
Good, solid, family-friendly, as evidenced by a tiny kit swimming by during inspection. Easy access to nearby ongoing dam construction. Current residents are constantly remodeling though
Well they would be. I assume that would actually be a plus to a beaver buyer. Materials and mud constantly on the move. What could attract more interest from a beaver?
The lodge
Don’t let the skunk cabbage discourage you! This lodge was abandoned but can be made shiny and new again with a little elbow grease and some sharp incisors.
Why would that discourage us? We can nibble it away. If we aren’t interested in the laxative properties we can always spit it out after we chew it down.
The fixer-upper
Stockpiled construction materials. Can also double as a food source. A real fixer-upper project for the ultimate (hungry) DIY-er.
Are you kidding? Everything beavers DO is a fixer upper! Fixing and refinishing are what beavers like best? If it can’t be changed it’s not worth building, amIrite?
The palatial estate
Private entrance (accessible by water only) and possible split level (the lodge is almost 6 feet tall – above the water!). Showing is by appointment only. Current residents are rather territorial. Previous encounters have included disgruntled tail slaps.
Well now that’s worth getting excited about. There are so many members of our city council in the real estate market I think they need to see this article. Heh heh.
Home Sweet Home.