It seems fitting that after yesterday’s feature of NCLC stewardship for Stanley Marsh (which was the very best beaver story I have covered in 5 years) there should follow a response to the worst beaver story I have read. Ever. No we’re not talking a tail-bounty or trip to the trapper’s back porch for an entire third grade classroom. In the 5 years of writing about beavers I’ve gradually become thick-skinned to those stories and they shock me less and less. I don’t much react to city politics or legislative lying to kill beavers. I don’t get startled anymore when folks pretend beavers eat salmon or harm salmon or kill trees for birds. This ain’t my first rodeo. I’ve seen it all before.
But THIS took my breath.
Keifer Oklahoma is in Creek county in the upper right corner of the state. Home to barely 2000 , its biggest excitement occurred when its primary paper the “Sapulpa Daily Herald” declined to report in November 2008 that Obama had won the presidential election and indicated instead that McCain had won handily in Creek county.
(Okay then.)
Apparently there was a city meeting the other night where concerns could be addressed by public works and it was mentioned that the Department of Environmental Quality had asked for some water tests. When they went to assess the creek…well, read for yourself…
“I have walked the banks along Chiders and noticed there seemed to be Beaver Dams almost every 10 feet,” Gary Hudson said. “The Beavers have made the creek into a series of pools,” Ashford said.
Consensus among members was that the action of the beavers was definitely reducing the water flow and perhaps contributing to the degradation of water quality within Chiders.
As to what course of action to undertake to thin out the beaver population it was noted that in order to trap, remove, or kill the rodents that permits from the state were required when Kiefer undertook efforts in the past to remedeiate the beaver problem.
Wikipedia tells me that Kiefer has nearly two square miles of land and zero area of water, but apparently a little bit of the mostly dry Chiders creek runs through one corner. 
The ironically named “Creek county” is the furthermost right bottom dark red one above. Red meaning EXCEPTIONAL DROUGHT (which is worse than the very bad categories of Severe or Extreme) Red which means it is eligible for FEMA money for disaster relief for the alarming and enduring drought conditions it has suffered. I haven’t found yet just how much money its received, but I will. It’s definitely hundreds of thousands to pay for crops or livestock or business failure due to drought. Don’t get me wrong. FEMA is supposed to pay for disaster relief. That’s one of the reasons why we have a federal government. I’m happy my tax dollars help people after Katrina or Sandy and thrilled that even though the paper couldn’t bring itself to write the dread “O” word, the county is happy enough to cash his checks for disaster relief. But this sentence takes the cake
“there seemed to be Beaver Dams almost every 10 feet,” Gary Hudson said. “The Beavers have made the creek into a series of pools,”
If I were the Secretary of the Interior and I read a sentence like that in a meeting where they went on to discuss ‘thinning’ the population, I would crumple the check in my hand and light a cigar. “Mary,” I’d say, putting my feet up on her desk. “If you’re trapping the water-savers you obviously have no need for this money.” I’d take a few pointed puffs and watch her surprised face through the smokey haze of exhale. “I thought you learned something in the dust bowl, but I was obviously wrong.”
