Because the beaver isn't just an animal; it's an ecosystem!

Tag: Castor Rap


Wait until you see this fun video beaver rap as poet Steve Schmidt of Connecticut serenades author Ben Goldfarb at a presentation of Eager. Wonderful poetry and some really fun gangly Ben rap appreciation that will start your weekend right. Steve had the odd fortune of reading “Eager” around the same time he happened to see the musical Hamilton, with delightful results. What everyone needs on a Saturday morning from our soon to be VERY GOOD new friend.

Rap for Castor

––for Ben Goldfarb, author of Eager

You got problems out west, you’re runnin’ out of water
Temperatures risin’ and the world’s gettin’ hotter
Tryin’ to mitigate floods and stop runaway fires
You got water in quantity but not where you want it to be

You gave us no respect, so what did you expect?
You thought a buck-toothed rodent would be better as a hat
So you trapped us and snapped us until you’re all that
Too stupid to see that you were fracking up your habitat

You exceeded your need until greed was your creed
Had a shizzle vision of your mission, to speed
a landscape raping you should have been arresting
Now I guess your destiny is manifesting

They call me The Beaver
No, not the one by Ward Cleaver
Castor canadensis
Genus? I’d say genius

We shaped the contents of the continents
Masters of geology, ecology, hydrology, topology
Our diligence, intelligence, experience, and innate sense
could handle any consequence

Now you need us more than ever, brother
If you want to last forever and recover
Looks like you could use a furry god mother
Give you pristine streams, replenish all your aquifers
A salmon run replacin’ all the damage done
Another keystone species where there isn’t one
Just keep in mind the beaver battle cry:
Wetlands Are the Best Lands, and that’s no lie

With us it’s just pond to wetland to meadow to forest
And day or night, oh, the concatenatin’ chorus
So we’ll find a dam spot just where you needed one
Now leave it to the beavers, man: We’ll get the job done

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