You know you think you’re contributing in some small way. You like to think what you do makes a difference. And then someone comes along and says “Is this thing on?” And you realize you’ve been writing about beavers every morning for nothing.

At least that’s how it feels when author Frances Backhouse posted this yesterday on the beaver management forum and said “I think this is the FIRST time this ever happened!”

Hundreds lose internet service in northern B.C. after beaver chews through cable

Internet service was down for about 900 customers in Tumbler Ridge, B.C., after a beaver chewed through a crucial fibre cable, causing “extensive” damage.

In a statement, Telus spokesperson Liz Sauvé wrote that in a “very bizarre and uniquely Canadian turn of events,” crews found that a beaver chewed through the cable at multiple points, causing the internet to go down on Saturday at about 4 a.m.

“Our team located a nearby dam, and it appears the beavers dug underground alongside the creek to reach our cable, which is buried about three feet underground and protected by a 4.5-inch thick conduit. The beavers first chewed through the conduit before chewing through the cable in multiple locations,” the statement said.

First time?

This tale is SO OLD that the first time I heard it I fell off my dinosaur and broke my wooden underwear. Remember the beaver that started fires by chewing through the power pole? Or the beaver that ruined medical supplies? Or the beaver that shut down 911 calls by chewing through the cord? Or the beaver that knocked out power at that wedding ceremony?

Gee do you think, just maybe, MAYBE that beavers get blamed kind of like you blamed your little brother when your mom didn’t see who spilled at the table? Do you think it’s an easy way to explain something that should have been avoided or averted or planned for but got overlooked and happened anyway?

I believe if you google the phrase “Blame it on the Beaver” you will get many,many hits. 17 headlines from this website alone. I remember making this graphic 11 years ago for just such an article.

So no, paying attention to crimes against beavers doesn’t matter or change the world in any meaningful way. Even people who are known for being obsessed with beavers do not notice. And people who like to pretend this never happened before so that they don’t look irresponsible for not planning how to avoid it, get away with it when they say it’s unHEARD of.

But sometimes it gets noticed. I remind myself I did make it into the “acknowledgements” section of Ben Golfarb famous book.

“Second, Heidi Perryman has supplied me with an endless stream of stories, sources, studies and quips since our first email exchange. This book would be far drier without her involvement.”

Okay. I’m a book moistener, Maybe I won’t stop just yet.