You cannot imagine with what glee the media is joyfully spreading the beaver-flinging story. It is in every conceivable paper and news station including CBS, Time, the CBC and the Guardian. I am not very surprised that beaver-haters find it amusing. But I am a little disturbed by the sporty good humor of the beaver crowd themselves reacting to this tale with [boyish] thigh-slapping hoots. They see humor where I see horror. I can’t be the only one, surely? Their response suggests I’m an animal-hugging worrywart who never has any real fun. There have even been hinted arguments on the beaver management forum about what a noble beaver-centric act this was, by good people who genuinely understood the value of beaver on the landscape.
Okay. History in every state is full of fish and game wardens who recognized almost too late that beaver matter on the landscape. This does not surprise me. To be clear, I am not questioning their motivations. They may have had the very best dam motives on the planet. I am reacting to their implementation. Which was barbarically ruthless and wasteful. The report points cheerfully to only ONE death by the beaver that leaped out of his box in mid air. But we know full well that even the very responsible Methow project says beaver relocation by LAND is only 50% successful – so what are the realistic possible numbers for flinging?
Tell me honestly now, do you think this story of beaver reintroductions would have gotten HALF the media attention without the bizarre cruelty? Beaver reintroduction in the twenties and thirties was happening all over California, not to mention all over the country. Have you ever seen a single news story about it?
I don’t know about you, but I got very distinct strains of the Laika story in this feverish beaver-flinging glee. There was a lot of humor when Russians shot the dog into space too, and some alarm from the hopelessly compassionate Brits which was to be expected.
What if the newly recovered footage showed tossing wolves over Yellowstone? Or mountain lions over Yosemite? Then could you reasonably expect advocates to object? I’m going to guess that this footage was buried for a reason, and that even in Idaho people didn’t want to see beavers be flung from great heights and realize taxpayers paid for the trip.
Anyway they’re wrong about me not having a sense of humor. I have a robust one. Because I just found this very pastoral clip from Idaho public radio and even as I type I’m entertaining some most amusing ideas about what to do with the audio.
Bwahaha.
Long-Lost Parachuting Beaver Footage
Here’s an alternate reintroduction strategy that produces slightly less alarm.